3 Tips for A Happier, Less Stressful Family Holiday ;-)
Dear Friend,
You might be like me- I love holidays with family & friend get-togethers, but sometimes I get a feeling in my stomach just thinking about it (If you’re my family reading this, this is not about you ❤️, promise :-).
After years of reflection, I’ve finally figured it out- It’s not about who will be there or how I perceive they may have slighted or annoyed me in the past- it’s about me. I might not feel like talking, I won’t be funny enough, my food won’t be good enough, I’ll get angry if this person says this or does that, I’ll feel jealous that someone seems to be doing better than me, and so on.
There can also be an element of repressed emotion that I am not even aware of, making me act like a jerk, then beating myself up even more about it. (To be honest, all of this can occur in my head before I even get to the party 😃)
So… what to do?
These three things help me. I do them before I walk in the door, in addition to praying for strength & patience :-)
Address My Stress/Anxiety
I have observed, if I don’t handle my stress/anxiety, I can project any self judgment, worry, anger, and resentment onto others. That’s not fair to them. Even if I think they’ve done something to hurt me, how I react is always my responsibility. So to tackle my anxiety immediately, get my brain back online, and enjoy the holidays, I start by doing this 60 second Anxiety Reducing Exercise.
I Want To Be Present While Giving Presents
When I am present I can enjoy myself more, and at least for one day set aside any resentment or perceived slights I may have toward others (truthfully, this goes back to how I feel about myself- I know if I have ill will toward others, I am most likely feeling ill will toward myself, otherwise I would be able to control how I feel and not let anything ruin my holiday) The fastest way to get present is to breath deeply and gently, drop my shoulders, and smile. You and I cannot experience two emotions at the same time. If I am feeling grateful, I cannot feel resentful. I challenge you to try it now- Smile, and try to feel angry at someone at the same time (You can’t do it ;-)
Look Into Their Eyes
When I pause, listen to what someone is saying, and compassionately look directly into their eyes, I see it- Their greatness. It’s in all of us. We just have to pause long enough to let it come out. Also, when someone feels heard, it can disarm them, temporarily forgetting slights and genuinely connecting to the good that is in each of us.
I wish for you and those you love a happy, healthy, and fun holiday season.
With Love ❤️,
Peter
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Peter Kofitsas MS, PT is a Speaker, Author, International Life & Health Coach, Culinary Nutritionist, Physical Therapist, Food/Restaurant Consultant, and former Scholarship Football Athlete. He’s also been called, “The Missing Link” in employee wellbeing. As an expert for the media, he has appeared on ABC, FOX, MSN, TLC, and in Fitness magazine. He’s the author of 3 books, including, Shop, Cook, Eat. He’s also the creator of the 5 Minutes to Fitness+ Program, a revolutionary lifestyle program for achieving optimal health which has been featured on QVC and FOX. He’’s been helping companies assist their employees in being healthier and finding balance during the Covid- 19 pandemic.
CV
Nutrition Degree, Magna Cum Laude, Montclair State University
Physical Therapy degree, Master of Science, New York Medical College
College Lecturer- nutrition, exercise, physical therapy, kinesiology
Creator- 5 Minutes to Fitness+, Fit Friends’ Revolution
Author; Shop, Cook, Eat, Core Energy Program, & Live Better Journal
Food/Restaurant Consultant- Hospitality Training, Sustainable Menu Design, Recipe Development
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GE • Goldman Sachs • KPMG • Verizon • Metropolitan Museum of Art • Sony • UPS • Quest Diagnostics • Whole Foods • Louis Vuitton • Moët Hennessy • Working Mother • Kellari Group • Serafina Group • China Grill Management • Union Square Hospitality Group • The Episcopal Church • St Barnabas Health Care Systems • HDMS • Grocery Haulers • NY Staffing Assoc • Assoc of Health Care Recruiters