Dear Friend,

Out of respect for you as an adult, I won’t lecture you about any new year’s resolutions you may have made.

Let me instead get right to the point and share how to feel better right now.

My intention is never to mislead you, so let me explain what I mean by feeling better.

I use the phrase, “feeling better” to refer to both how I’m feeling in my mind, and my body, because to me, one just does not seem possible without the other.

What follows is what helps me to feel better, no matter where I am, no matter what I’m doing.

To be clear, this is different than feeling great. To feel great there are consistents that you and I can do, including eating a certain way, training (exercising) our bodies a certain way, and directing our minds a certain way. I’ve written about those three things extensively in the past because they have made my life better. Check out my previous health letters and social media posts for more on that.

What I’m talking about here is feeling better when there is pain in our minds, our bodies, or both. That feeling of pain can be physical or emotional- anxiety, back pain, worry about finances, stomach pain, bloating, headaches, or just generally worrying about everything and anything, as I can often find myself doing. I say this without judgment- the way many of us numb the pain is with alcohol, drugs, sex, gambling, working, cheating, judging, social media scrolling, news watching, and so on. This temporarily numbs the pain, and just prolongs the inevitable agony.

Desperate, we hit a threshold, start a new diet, workout, or motivational program- but we know where that gets us.

If you relate to any of this, read on…

What helps me most in times of pain, desperate to feel better sooner than later, is to focus on two things;

Purpose
People

Let’s look at Purpose first..

PURPOSE

Because I have been brought to my knees time and time again by life, humbled, I have been compelled to ask a higher power, “What is the purpose of my life?”

By taking long walks, and sitting alone, quietly, sometimes for hours, the answers slowly come- My purpose is to do what I’m doing now- sharing with you how to feel better and find purpose in a world that can seem cruel and unforgiving.

Here’s how I find purpose sit or walk quietly, and ask for guidance. (You can call it praying, or whatever seems right for you)

Why?

When you are and I are tapped into our purpose, everything else seems to matter less. Not that we can neglect paying our mortgage or car payment, but we see more clearly what’s most important in life.

So I encourage you now, take a walk somewhere beautiful, even if just in your mind, or sit alone, quietly, with no distractions. Then ask whatever you believe in to help you find the purpose of why you are here.

Know this- if you and I ask a good question, we will surely get a good answer. We just need to be patient. In fact, I’ve come to understand this- praying is asking for guidance, and meditation is listening for the answer.

Having found our purpose, that leads us to #2; our people.

PEOPLE

You don’t have to agree with me, but I believe the purpose of life, besides the work that we do (Purpose), is to love and be loved. So I direct my mind to think about the people in my life that I love, and how I can be present for them so I can better serve them.

The reason this works for me is, instead of worrying about bills, or the news, I direct my mind and body to focus on those I love, and how I can help them.

I didn’t come up with this strategy on my own, which I think is brilliant by the way.

Why?

Because instead of worrying about what I cannot control- people, the economy, etc, I can focus on what I can control- being the best person I can be for those I love.

For over 30 years, (Truthfully, since my father ended his life when I was 16) I have been searching for answers. I;ve learned many people wiser than me have been where I am standing now, coming to the same conclusion- Waht matters most is my purpose, and my people.

If any of this resonates with you, reach out to me, even just to say, “I get it.” We are stronger together than alone. And please know this- You are never alone if you love.

All my best,

Peter

Contact