Finding Fulfillment At Work/Home
Dear Friend,
Do you feel fulfilled at work? Home? Are you wondering if you’re alone in how you feel?
Below is a screenshot of a recent google search I did. It’s a head-scratcher- how can job satisfaction, one of the factors of fulfillment, be at an all time low, but also at an all time high at almost the same time? In my experience, if we let it, the media will drive us even more crazy than we already feel.
The quote below is what I’ve understood talking to my audiences and coaching clients.
“Gallup, in its recently released State of the Global Workplace: 2022 report, found that, along with dissatisfaction, workers are experiencing staggering rates of both disengagement and unhappiness. Sixty percent of people reported being emotionally detached at work and 19% as being miserable. Only 33% reported feeling engaged — and that is even lower than 2020.”
And if we are unhappy at work, that will affect our home life.
So, what can we do about it, short of looking for another job, and perhaps continued unhappiness? Maybe we can find fulfillment right now.
Read below to find out how.
All my best,
Peter
Being Fulfilled At Work/Home
Reframing
My therapist, Frank, taught me this concept. Basically it’s reinterpreting everything in life to have a benefit.
At first glance I thought, “We'll, am I just pretending my life is better than it actually is?”
Yes, that’s the point. Not that I have to pretend, but depending on what I choose to focus on, or how I interpret things, my life is actually better than I can believe it is right now.
Abraham Lincoln said, “If you look for the bad in Mankind expecting to find it, you surely will.”
That means, if I choose to see the good that is already there, I will.
HOW DOES IT WORK?
If someone cuts me off, maybe they did me a favor, perhaps saving my life from an impending accident around the corner.
If my boss makes unreasonable demands of me, perhaps she sees something in me that I may not. Or, he’s doing me a favor reminding me, he’s having a worse day/life than me and is just taking it out on me.
So, I have a choice- hate my boss for being a jerk, or have empathy, while not absorbing the negativity.
BTW- One of the top 10 things people report wanting more of, in addition to happiness and money, is freedom. Seeing a choice in everything gives us immediate freedom, and the potential for happiness, and ultimately, having more money.
Let me give you a personal example. In 2008 when the economy crashed, I was forced to look for steady work as my speaking business dried up. I took a job that paid the bills but I felt was beneath me; messy office, less than optimal clientele, laissez-faire owners. I complained to Frank, after all my hard work, I can’t believe I have to work in an office like this.”
Frank replied, “That’s one way to look at it.”
“What do you mean?”
If you believe this job is beneath you and unfulfilling, then you’re right. Or…”
“Or, what?”
“You can try and find the good that is already there. Look for the benefit for you and those you love.”
That’s when I reframed the job and what it meant. Though it took some time and work, this is what I came up with. “Thank God I can support my 3 young children while I regroup.”
What happened when I did that? I went from hating my job, dreading driving to the office every morning, to seeing the truth. I was being a good father, doing what I had to do to support my children.
Then something happened that I never expected, and Frank just smiled at. I made some of the best friends I still have to this day, treated wonderful, kind people, and met my current girlfriend of 5 years. All from a job I thought was beneath me. 16 years later, I still work there part time, grateful for the generosity of the owners over the years.
I believe I was able to see and experience the good that was always there because Frank told me I could. Sometimes we just need someone we trust to tell us it’s ok. That’s why I urge my audiences to work with a therapist, coach, or both.
HOW TO USE REFRAMING
Interpret everything that happens to you as a benefit, a lesson, a gift, a sign.
Every person that comes into my life is teaching me something to make me the best person I can be, whether it’s patience in the grocery store, generosity in traffic, kindness to a lost stranger, self confidence when a person’s judging me.
Every time my bank account dips below my comfort zone, I am reminded money does not make me feel secure, it’s just something I use to do the things I want to do for those I love. My security comes from my purpose and relationships.
Every perceived disappointment, whether at work or home, is a lesson in humility, reminding me I work hard not for my boss/client’s approval, but because it is my path in life, and the key to my fulfillment at work and home.
If this makes sense to you, what benefit can you see in your current job, relationship? If you want to share, I’d love to know- email me.
Need a speaker On Fulfillment/Happiness?
Let’s Talk
About Peter Kofitsas MS, PT
Testimonial
“Peter delivered what was by far the best one-hour presentation that our audience has ever seen. Full of energy, entertainment and mind-altering knowledge, he helped set the stage for all of us to rethink our daily habits. His session may honestly be the best I’ve ever attended, the perfect blend of knowledge and showmanship! He conducted a health and wellness session during our Mazda USA’s Northeast Region 2023 Field Meeting. Peter’s presentation was informative, enlightening, and entertaining. He used examples that resonated with all attendees and provided information we could all use in our everyday lives. He is an excellent speaker who got the audience engaged and excited.”
Deb Eliopoulos, Manager, Regional Marketing, Mazda North American Operations
PROFESSIONAL
Peter Kofitsas MS, PT is a Speaker, Author, International Life & Health Coach, Culinary Nutritionist, Physical Therapist, Food/Restaurant Consultant, and former Scholarship Football Athlete. He’s also been called, “The Missing Link” in employee wellbeing. As an expert for the media, he has appeared on ABC, FOX, MSN, TLC, and in Fitness magazine. He’s the author of 3 books, including, Shop, Cook, Eat. He’s also the creator of the 5 Minutes to Fitness+ Program, a revolutionary lifestyle program for achieving optimal health which has been featured on QVC and FOX. He’’s been helping companies assist their employees in being healthier and finding balance during the Covid- 19 pandemic.
CV
Nutrition Degree, Magna Cum Laude, Montclair State University
Physical Therapy degree, Master of Science, New York Medical College
College Lecturer- nutrition, exercise, physical therapy, kinesiology
Creator- 5 Minutes to Fitness+, Fit Friends’ Revolution
Author; Shop, Cook, Eat, Core Energy Program, & Live Better Journal
Food/Restaurant Consultant- Hospitality Training, Sustainable Menu Design, Recipe Development
Client List / Appearances
GE • Goldman Sachs • KPMG • Verizon • Metropolitan Museum of Art • Sony • UPS • Quest Diagnostics • Whole Foods • Louis Vuitton • Moët Hennessy • Working Mother • Kellari Group • Serafina Group • China Grill Management • Union Square Hospitality Group • The Episcopal Church • St Barnabas Health Care Systems • HDMS • Grocery Haulers • NY Staffing Assoc • Assoc of Health Care Recruiters
